I revise this to complete lost steps visually too... added pollen and clouds of flies and falling leaves and daughter trees in golden proportion...
Lost in Your Troubled Dreams Fibonacci Form
L. Edgar Otto Aug. 24, 2013
I posted for the toads my song on youtube. I will eventually re-post the full lyrics here but for now here is an excerpt from a common theme between the stanzas:
I
Saw
So long
You nineteen
Over night crow's feet
. . .
Knew
Pain
First tears
Little feet
Yet had so much fun
. . .
Sun
Dress
Long hair
In bare feet
How you loved your brood
. . . .
I
I held
I held her close
Close
rose
colored
glassy eyes
Her
dance
far from
prying crowds
I
held
her close
we danced, rose
rhymed far from colors
crowd's madding prying eyes
Danced
from
madness
her
held
I
* * * *
Seeking Out There Somewhere
L. Edgar Otto Sunday, 25 August, 2013
I
thought
I might
find the truth
if out there somewhere
aborted
our dreams
fade
back
No
damn
quantum
cat no damn
cradle made of strings
fiery walled
black holes
new
worlds
More
real
than she
held so close
baby universes
conjuring
space time's
deep
eyes
Braids
knots
weightless
discoveries
our geometries
written down
nowhere
in
books
One
truth
forgive
out of time
fading falling sand
far from heat
emptied
nests
keys
* * * *
Gentle Raindrops, Peaceful Tidal SwayL. Edgar Otto 25 August, 2013
No
null
zero
beyond time
stopping quanta waves
once begun
many
beats
lubb dub
synchronize
our cycles, heart sparks
wading pool
Petri
dish
So
full
his life
swath thru time
room enough unique
world like mine
distinct
near
rhyme
* * * *
An interesting series exploring the form. I especially like the diagrammed version of the last one. Thank you for sharing with us.
ReplyDeleteVery cool and unique - I loved the plays on Hardy - the dancing far from the prying crowds especially. k.
ReplyDeleteIntricate, form mirrors the subject. The whole is a puzzle that dances.
ReplyDeletehedgewitch... I added a little clearer drawing to the puzzle dogwoods and maple leaves, apples and cherries from hidden roots in interwoven dance, rest, growth and fruit of poems...
ReplyDeleteI like the twist from you holding her, she holding you in the end ~ Thanks for the diagrammed illustration as well though I prefer to read them as is ~
ReplyDeleteThe poetic mood in young love and breaking symmetry... I don't know where to post this one on the mood as more and more of our population ages into the near future... call it Monday's challenge perhaps... "Seeking Somewhere Out There" as the children of Vonnegut face isolation in nursing homes. Science still as abstract and unreal while wisdom grows more sensitive if we are lucky and if we are not too judgmental on our life and self still to care for living touch and dreaming.
ReplyDeleteyour writing is so interesting and this is no exception, love it.
ReplyDeletethe song really builds as you sing, and I admire your dedication to the craft.
ReplyDeleteLove you exploration of the form...great writing!
ReplyDelete